Yay, Life

Continuing the tradition of posting only when I'm in a bad mood, I figured now would be a good time. As many of you know (if anyone reads this lousy old thing anymore) tomorrow is my birthday. You may also know that I hate my birthday, as well as most (if not all) holidays. Here's a little glimpse into why:

2001: I told my parents I wanted a punching bag for Christmas. They insisted I needed to pick it up with them and then preceded to drive around yelling at each other because they couldn't find the store. All the while I'm in the back almost in tears saying "Let's go home." When we finally do find a sports store my mom insists that I'm too young to use a punching bag, but purchases it anyway. When we get home my dad is mad because he has to hang it. For many weeks my mom would get angry when I use it, saying it makes the whole house shake and keeps complaining until I stop using it for it's intended purpose and convert it into a seat.

Today: My mom and I get into an argument about how bad of a person I am and she threatens again to kick me out. I tell her I have places I can go, and she gets angry. She then tells me that she's been out in the kitchen working hard on my present (a set of dishes for when I move out - we already ate off them), like it's such a huge inconvenience to wash some fucking dishes. I told her I don't want to celebrate my birthday and she gets more offended than anything and goes in the other room and cried. That made me feel like the bad guy even though she's the one who came into my room and started arguing with me (She was mad because I told Steve to get his fat ass out of my way).

I pretty much hate myself right now. I was feeling pretty low the other day, and Jason swooped in to make it all better, but now I feel even worse than I did that day. The number 1 reason I hate myself: [this space intentionally left blank, but we all know what it is]. Thanks mom. :)