Frustration

I think the thing that frustrates me most about my life if my relationship with the people I live with. It's hard relating to an elderly conservative Christian when you're a 25 year old, gay, atheist. And that's just my mom. I don't know where my dad stands on any issues because he barely talks to anyone.

Whenever I try to tell my mom something she goes out of her way to make me feel bad. The good news of one of my best friends getting married becomes a lecture about when I marry a beautiful woman. My friend having a child turns into a rant about how my mom will never be a grandmother. Obviously, reading a book about the influence of disease on human evolution is to prepare myself for when I get AIDS.

And those are just the things I've told her. I haven't mentioned that I plan on moving in with Jason (preferably in Ann Arbor) sometime this year. Or the fact that Jason and I plan on spending the rest of our lives together. Or the inevitability that Jason and I will one day in the future get married and have a reception. Or that I don't believe in the same invisible hand in the sky that sue does.

There is just no common ground for us to start a conversation. She's dead set that I chose to be gay to cause some sort of drama for her. Her little burgundy book told her so. She'll never understand the relationship that I have with Jason and that kills me. She'll never be happy about any of the major events in my life. Moving in together and getting married are major events in my life that she will either write off as dramatic fantasy or simply not be notified of. And I feel that there's nothing I can do about it.

I'm just stuck in a rut, suffocating in my house, and I need to get out.